Have you ever noticed that the things that bug you on the level of frustration or anger are usually about things that you can't control? That's what seems to be what galls us most and it seems to typically be about other people's behavior. But you have to go below the surface: Why do certain things bother you?
For me I have had to take a close look at this in my attempt to eradicate this feeling from myself. It seems like a simple matter of being honest about it. Do I like having these sorts of feelings? Hell NO! So, I look and see where it comes from and the seeing has a magical lifting effect. Just being honest with myself has the ability to loosen up the pull towards wanting control.
And it is control that we have to be willing to give up. Control over our own identity. So what if someone says something bad about you? So what if she didn't act according to expectations? So what if someone doesn't give you recognition? All these things revolve around the idea of keeping an identity intact. But the supporting and cobbling together of an illusory identity has a draining effect on your energy. Energy that can be opened up and used for purposes that are much more satisfying. Like figuring out what kind of life you truly want or making things flow in a more relaxed, less serious, and fun way.
A Course in Miracles mentioned something that has always stuck with me, "Would you rather be right or happy?" This is touching upon what I am trying to explain. Letting go, releasing control, going with the flow. Being unconcerned about how you are perceived in the world is a liberating thing.
No comments:
Post a Comment